


Everything I Do Is For You

by DemonSquipster



Category: Supernatural
Genre: British Men of Letters Being Assholes, Comfort/Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, I Don't Even Know, I'm Sorry, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Torture, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, M/M, a H, i don't even know how to tag this it's just so, i don't know where this came from, i just had a lot of thoughts last night, oh boy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-04
Updated: 2018-11-04
Packaged: 2019-08-17 15:38:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16519268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DemonSquipster/pseuds/DemonSquipster
Summary: Mick doesn't know if he can bring himself to admit, out loud, his feelings for Ketch are more than friendly. He spends the morning with Ketch, lost in his thoughts.AKA I'm terrible at summaries, the British Men of Letters suck, and you can't convince me that Ketch isn't bisexual thanks for your time





	Everything I Do Is For You

For the first time in a while, Mick hadn’t woken up alone. 

When he opened his eyes, he saw the bare backside of Arthur Ketch, and he couldn’t help but smile to himself as he listened to the sound of rain falling against the window. Ketch stared out, almost like he was looking at nothing in particular. Mick recognised the look well enough to know that Ketch was lost in his thoughts. 

Ketch turned away from the window and walked over towards the pile of clothes he’d left on Mick’s bedroom floor. One word fell from Mick’s lips before he even knew he was saying it.  _ Stay _ . The word was no louder than a whisper, but Ketch’s attention quickly turned towards Mick.

The male sat up on the bed, trying not to feel uncomfortable under Ketch’s gaze. He couldn’t identify any particular emotion in Ketch’s face, but he was certain Ketch had heard him. He watched as Ketch stood back up, practically towering over Mick. “If you’d like me to stay, I will.” Ketch’s words were soft, but brought relief to Mick. He instantly relaxed, and thoughts of Ketch leaving faded from his mind. He wouldn’t, not yet. Mick knew that very well. 

No words would come to Mick’s lips, none that seemed suitable for a reply. So instead he just nodded, and lied back down. His eyes didn’t leave Ketch though, and he watched as Ketch walked over to the bed and lied down next to him. He felt Ketch’s arms wrap around him, and he impulsively clung to him. Ketch’s fingers nestled in Mick’s hair, and Mick buried his face in the crook of Ketch’s neck. God, it had been so long since anyone had ever bothered to hold him like this; he’d almost forgotten what it was like. 

He choked back a sob that threatened to rip from his lungs at the thought. He couldn’t let Ketch see him cry- he  _ wouldn’t _ . But fuck, it felt so good to have someone show him any sort of real affection. 

Affection in the world of the Men of Letters always came with a price. But here was Ketch, reminding him what it was like to actually be cared for, even if it was for a brief moment, and there was no catch. No punishment for showing weakness, no one around to use it to their advantage. Just pure, unbidden affection. 

It wasn’t long after that he realised that Ketch had drifted off to sleep against Mick. The man couldn’t help but observe the sleeping figure next to him. Ketch looked so innocent and vulnerable wrapped around him. Mick rested his forehead against Ketch’s chest, and let sleep take him as well. There were no Men of Letters here, no one to tell them that they were wrong for doing this. It was just them, and only them. 

He fell back asleep, dreaming of a future life with Ketch.

When he woke back up, he glanced at the clock on his nightstand. Hours had passed in between, and he sat up a little. He’d nearly forgotten that he had asked Ketch to stay, and smiled in response to the drowsy smirk Ketch gave him. 

“I see you finally decided to wake up,” Ketch teased. Mick groaned, but he didn’t mind the teasing all that much. He appreciated it, really. They hadn’t been like this since their Kendricks days, and if he was being honest, he’d missed it. The teasing, the sleeping together - in all meanings of the phrase, the constant presence of someone Mick actually trusted. He knew that what had happened the previous night was not intended by either of them. But was Mick going to complain about any of it? Of course not.

He had just simply invited Ketch over for dinner, hoping a little bit of company would help get him out of his thoughts. He didn’t want to just end up drinking himself into a stupor again. But it was the only way he could bring himself to sleep. Dead bodies haunted him every time he closed his eyes, and he just needed a break. He needed some kind of distraction, and he’d called Ketch in a panic. Ketch certainly was a distraction - perhaps not the kind of distraction Mick had needed, but the kind of distraction he wanted. 

His body certainly had wanted it. It had been too long since he’d let anyone touch him like that. Unlike many of his fellow Men of Letters, he didn’t feel very comfortable going out to bars, and getting charmed into some pretty someone’s (Man’s? Woman’s? He didn’t know anymore, and quite frankly, he wasn’t sure if he cared to find out,) bed, just to move on and act like it didn’t happen in the first place. He craved something more - he wanted a relationship that was more than just a friends with benefits-type thing. He knew that a part of him wanted that with Ketch.

“Mick.” He snapped out of his thoughts, and stared at the man under him. “Would you mind at all if I went and showered?” It took Mick a moment to register the question, because he was still thinking about other things, but when his brain finally caught up with him, he nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, of course.” He moved off of Ketch to allow the man to get up.

Ketch sat up, and leaned close to Mick. “Would you like to get in with me?” He asked, grinning. Mick was caught off-guard by the question, but still a smile crossed his face. “Yeah, actually, I would.” He slid the duvet off of him, and stood up. He had to pause for a moment to adjust when his feet first met the cold, wood floor. He winced, feeling an ache spike through his body. The effect of last night was really starting to hit him, and he heard Ketch chuckle. 

“You think this is funny?” He asked. A scoff escaped his lips, despite the smile on his face. “Perhaps,” Ketch replied, sounding rather pleased with himself. Mick rolled his eyes, and walked off to the nearest bathroom. 

_ ‘It could be like this every day if you would just admit that you fucking like him,’  _ Mick told himself. How could he not like Ketch? There were countless women - and men - in the Men of Letters who would (possibly even literally) kill to be in his position right now. They would throw themselves at his feet if it meant being where Mick is now. Yet despite it all, Ketch chose to spend his time with Mick. The thought left a giddy feeling in the shorter man. 

Mick slipped the bathroom door shut behind them and hoped that maybe he could manage to keep Ketch around just a little bit longer. Ketch was one of the only people - if not the only person - who actually understood Mick, or bothered to care about him. Even if they weren’t as close as they had been in the past, Mick still appreciated every little text from Ketch. He wouldn’t admit it to anyone - mostly because it’s not like he had anyone else to admit it to, and he certainly wouldn’t tell Ketch - but something akin to warmth and joy flooded through him every time he saw the little messages pop up on his screen. They were all things like, ‘have you eaten today? I worry about you,’ and ‘how are you doing today?,’ and his personal favourite, ‘I wouldn’t mind coming over if you ever needed me. I’m here for you, Michael.’ 

It was never about how Ketch was feeling though. Mick had tried multiple times to do the same, but Ketch always deflected it with things like, ‘don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. Focus on yourself, love.’ It frustrated Mick because he wanted to make sure Ketch was taking care of himself too. But Ketch was stubborn, and Mick was well aware of that. He wouldn’t let Mick become aware that something was wrong with him unless he was in too much pain to argue, or if he wasn’t in the right mindset to remember that he wanted to argue with Mick. Waking up from nightmares was an example of not being in the right mindset. 

It didn’t matter what their current relationship looked like. Whether they were getting romantically involved with each other, or barely speaking to the other, they both knew that the other was there for them. They’d been through too much at Kendricks to just forget that. Mick had grown too attached to Ketch, despite what the Men of Letters said about relationships. Ketch was important to him. He wouldn’t give that up.

Mick wasn’t naive, or stupid. He knew damn well what Ketch had done with Toni. He also knew about everything the Men of Letters had made Ketch do. He’d seen the pictures, and heard the descriptions. After all, he’d had to write several reports about these things. In some cases, the Men of Letters had even made him watch videos. He couldn’t wrap his head around it. He didn’t, and probably never would, understand how someone who had tortured and killed innocents could move on and be so caring and gentle to others.

Mick, naturally, had to take this into account. He cared about Ketch. (Loved? God, he wanted to, but that was only if Ketch would love him back.) He could still care about the man without supporting his actions, right? It’s not as if Ketch had necessarily wanted to do it. He’d told Mick that countless times, but Mick couldn’t deny seeing some kind of pleasured look on Ketch’s face as he carried out some of these commands. 

He gasped a little as Ketch’s arms wrapped around his torso. He felt Ketch’s lips come into contact with the crook of his neck, and he leaned into the touch. He hadn’t even realised it, but Ketch had already started the water. He noticed Ketch break away, and walk into the shower. 

Perhaps he would tell Ketch everything soon. All the ‘I love you’s that circled in his mind. But for now, he would deal with the ‘stay’s that slipped from his mouth, and be grateful that Ketch cared for him enough to ensure that Mick stayed happy and healthy. 

_ I will be by your side until you ask me not to, but I will fight for you until your heart stops beating, and I will still love you after.  _


End file.
